Uninspired, no time, not enough experience.

That's how I feel about the intermittent stolen time with my camera today.

I shot more of the blue vase. Didn't like a one.

While driving my car inside the garage, I spotted a black widow just outside the garage on a wall. I ran inside for my camera and began taking some photos of the spider. She was big. Mrs. Spider didn't like the flash much. I was sitting on the ground hoping to get a picture of the red spot, when I felt something on my leg. I thought that something was Mrs Spider, or a relative spider. I got right up and figured that was enough shooting.

Soooo, no photos today. Well, I'll post proof I used the camera today.

Thursday after 10am is mine to go play with the camera and various lens.

Ray's flowers turned the day around.

I'd told Ray what a hard day I'd had and an hour later he came home from errands with this thoughtful, mood altering "Love" bouquet. See the black vertical letters spelling out LOVE? That's my husband. I love you Baby.

Goodbye and hello Mr. President

A couple of TV shots I took today.

I've changed my mind.

I lied. I’ve changed my mind. I am not going to be posting a photo a day as I stated on January 1st. Actually, I don’t know when I’ll post the next photo. How’s that? My life is so full (that’s short for unmanageable) I’m running from one thing to the next. I don’t have a job, don’t have children, and I can’t get done what’s already on my plate each day. I don’t get it. I’ve never tended to as many tasks as I do each day yet my to-do list increases by 3 or 4 new tasks by the end of the day.
I don’t want to just fit in taking a photo. I want taking photos to be a want to, not have to. Right now I haven’t a clue how to find dedicated camera time or dedicated anytime for myself. So I am scratching taking the photo a day Ideal off my New Year Ideal’s list. There. That feels much better.
I like being able to change my mind.
Now the question is how I start eliminating all the other unnecessary tasks I daily generate for myself?
Take tonight. I went to my GSR District meeting, quite clear that if I was asked to fill an open position I was going to say no. As the Secretary was going down the agenda she started asking people if they’d be willing to take on some of the long standing, unfilled, open service commitments. No one was offering to Chair any of these service commitments. I couldn’t believe people could just sit there without guilt and comfortably allow the silence to not motivate them into relenting, raising their hand and saying, “Oh, ok. I’ll do it.” The silence was awkward. My mind kept thinking about whether I should help out. Then I remembered that I wasn’t taking on one more thing. So, I sat on my hands like the rest of the GSRs.
Then I had the bright idea that I could help them out by asking the secretary to give a more complete description of the positions she was trying to get filled. You know, I was thinking people might raise their hands if they knew what was involved with taking on one or another of these service commitments. Before I knew it the attention was on me and stayed on me. Someone nominated me for District Committee Chair. I told them I am not here in the summer. . (I told them I am away in the summer hoping they’d think I was a snowbird).They said, “Well, just do the commitment until July.” Without any acknowledgement on my part, other than my open mouth and wide eyes, I heard them nominate me for the DCM West position. What was I to do? With all eyes on me, I must have given some sort of positive acknowledgement and they all applauded. They weren’t really applauding that I took the job, they were applauding because then they didn’t feel guilty for not taking it.
I just don’t get it. This commitment entails my going to meetings from Rancho Mirage on west to who knows where, talking up the importance of being a GSR, how a group isn’t represented if they don’t have a GSR.
I am powerless over saying NO, that my life is unmanageable.
I might just have to go back next month and tell them at the District Committee Meeting that I lied!

I'm back. Here is a pick-me-up video.

http://pixsylated.com/2008/10/the-best-web-video-ive-seen-in-a-month-no-ever/
I'm sure LR needs a break to watch it.
Enjoy, as I did.

p.s. Once you click on the link don't forget to read Matt's story linked on the blog.

My 3rd online class assignment with Carol Leigh - Twos and Threes.

CRITIQUE: Linda Jeffers
Twos and Threes

THREE ON TWO

Woof! What a terrific photo,
Linda. I'm not sure what I'm
looking at, or looking through, or
looking into, but it doesn't matter
and I really don't want to know.
What you've created is an abstract
image with a lot of mystery, a lot
of drama, and a lot of power. You
lined things up just right. Your
exposure is just right. I love the
little highlights running along the
horizontal elements in the shot. I
like the grainy look to the scene.
And I like how the cars are so out
of focus yet sharp enough that we
know we're looking at cars.
Your three lights set the scene beautifully. The two cars?
Perfect. The grids that form a frame? Excellent. Do I have
any suggestions regarding how this picture could be any
better? Not a one. Major kudos, madam.

MULTI-PURPOSE VASES

This one's good, too. I like how
you've got a lot of depth of field, a
lot in focus from front to back.
Usually this is the result of
selecting an aperture that's quite
small -- the smaller the lens
opening or f/stop, the more will be
in focus.
Your lighting is good in that it's not
overly hot; there aren't any distracting hot spots. Yes,
there's glare on the glass, but it's not overexposed and
we EXPECT glass to have reflectivity.
I especially like how you put the vases on the diagonal.
There's also a diagonal line behind them, running in a
different direction. Those two diagonal lines give your
photo movement. We begin with the foreground vase,
move into the frame, and then the background diagonal
encourages us to move back toward the left. The vertical
nature of the vases and the reeds or stems within them,
give your photo a lot of height -- yet another direction
for our eyes to go. Lots of movement here, and done in
an orderly fashion.
Interesting photo, well-composed, well-exposed, well
done!

HAPPY UGLY FEET

Ha! I wish I could say you're the first to feature feet
in these classes, but Rebecca Ford (once of San
Francisco, now living in Mexico) beat you to it. She
would be pleased to see yours, however!
What makes your photo particularly compelling is
the lighting. The way the light is hitting your feet
and accentuating the texture of your skin and
creating shadows that set your toes apart is excellent.
What I also like is the combination of the bluishcolored
fabric at the bottom of the frame and how it
makes the warm golden tones of the background
look especially good. Complementary colors.
You created movement in
your shot by having a
long diagonal line lead us
up and into the frame; the diagonal line of your toes leads our eye
down to the foot on the left. Again, well done.
You should be INCREDIBLY pleased with these three photos.
They're not the sort of thing you usually photograph, and I hope you
had a fun time doing it.
Carol Leigh

I am so surprised by the Woof! I got in the critique on the first photo - Three on Two. I had read tonight's email I'd received while I was away in LA today. My friend Carol D. sent me the following email. I had not read my photo critique yet.

Linda -

I hope you know about a "woof" from Carol Leigh. It is like winning an Oscar. She rarely gives a woof and when she does, we covet them. In six years I have had One (1) "woof".

So, CONGRATULATIONS!!! Your photos are great and the "woof" is well deserved. You should be proud.

Good stuff, Linda.

CD

Funny thing.... while driving home from the meeting tonight I told Ray I wasn't feeling very good about my photography.....that yes I was learning a lot, enjoying what I was learning, especially since the Santa Fe workshop.....but I don't feel I have had the time to practice and digest what I have learned.

In about 9 days I am going away with my teacher, Carol Leigh, and 11 of her other students to photograph Half Moon Bay. The photos we all take will be featured in a book our teacher is going to publish. Many of the other students going are much more experienced than I and some are professionals. My mind has been telling me I shouldn't go. I should give up my spot as I know many of her other students wish they were going....wish they had read the email Carol sent out before all the spots were filled.

I am not going to listen to my mind. I'm going to go.

I am thrilled and surprised with the critique of my Twos and Threes photos. I did have fun with this assignment even though these are not things I would normally photograph.

Off to Mammoth for the month of August.

When the pool/fountain guy was here last week and we were in the backyard, he mentioned that this pictured fountain my brother gave me one birthday would look better moved from where it was to this new position, right outside my desk window.

This Junco bird has made the Angel's head his new perching place. I love it because, as my husband knows, I believe my deceased mother has come back in the form of a Junco bird. Silly, but true.


We won't have internet access, so until September, have a great month.

Scraping the barrell for a daily photo.

My funny husband's captions for this photo I took while we were watching CNN tonight:

"Check this footage."

"The thrill of victory or the Agony of de-feet."

Just when I didn't know what I was going to post today.......

Just in from my friend Carol.
http://www.blueribbonmovie.com/

Mama is feeding Baby #1

Yeah! A half hour ago, for the first time, I witnessed Mama feeding Baby, Babette. Yes, I have named her. Even Ray doesn't know that I've named her.

Mama flies away, comes back, arches her neck so she can position her long thin beak into Babette's beak. I actually saw the baby's head above the top level of the nest. I really believed that Baby's neck was broken because she never lifted it up.

When I first moved to the Ranch in Calabasas back in 1989, I inherited the previous owners' chickens. One of the chicken's names was Babette. Babette was great. Ray had just moved in and we both loved both chickens. Babette would come running when I called her name. I'd have a carrot in my mouth, I'd stoop down to her level and she'd waddle over as fast as she could to eat the carrot from my mouth.

Unfortunately, my dog Chamo liked Babette too. One day I came home to find Chamo feeding on Babette's back. I got Chamo off Babette only to find a round depression about a 1/4 inch deep, where Chamo had chewed down to exposed backbone. Poor Babette.

I raced Babette off in the car to the vet. The vet took one look at the bird's chewed on back and said there was nothing he could do....that there wasn't any skin to pull together enough to be able to sew the open wound closed. I said he had to find a way to close Babette up. He did and I kept Babette in our bedroom for two weeks while she healed. The doctor said that I'd have to keep her inside as any flies landing on her exposed skin would generate infection in Babette. $400 later.

I enjoyed having Babette inside for a while but only for a while. Ray and I put her outside. She was going to make it.

A short time later, I wanted to see how Babette was doing and I called for her to come get a carrot out of my mouth. Babette didn't come running. That was strange. Well, maybe she hadn't heard me. I called again, and still no Babette.

I walked around the ranch and couldn't find Babette anywhere. Chamo was by my side so I knew Chamo wasn't off with Babette again somewhere. I asked Ray if he'd seen Babette. No, he hadn't.

Days went by. Weeks went by. Many years later Ray confessed that he'd seen lots of feathers in one of the horses open corrals. The feathers were the same color as Babette's had been. Ray hadn't wanted me to feel bad so he hadn't told me. We had a resident Bobcat that I'm sure finished off what Chamo had started.

Ray hadn't told me because he knows I care too much about animals. And now I care about our birds. And I'm soooooo relieved that Baby Babette is being fed.

One more worry left.... when will the other egg will hatch?

Two morning photos.

Cindy has been down here in the desert working for me first for two days and now Sandi. This morning I picked Cindy up at Sandi's and we did the Bump & Grind at 6am. It was great walking and talking again with Cindy. Cindy and I (and Tina and I) used to meet rather regularly and do hikes near our house in Tarzana. I miss those hikes up Killer Hill in the Santa Monica Mountains.

Cindy seated atop Bump and Grind at around 6:45am.


I took another photo of baby hummingbird on my return from the hike. She looks like she is growing but her head is still not reaching upward for food. Her beak seems to be larger though and she is still breathing. What is going on with the unhatched egg though? In trying to move away from the nest after taking this photo, I jammed my foot right into a cactus. Ouch!

I just took a peak at the nest and Mama is perched directly on top of the baby and egg. She is NOT feeding her live baby!!! Come on, this is driving me and Ray crazy. Feed your baby Mama! Make us happy before we leave for LA today.

Condolences from my photo teacher.

I have received a number of understanding and caring emails from friends regarding the loss of all my camera gear. Thank you so much.

I also received many emails from my fellow photo classmates who live with this fear daily. But I am posting an email from my photo class teacher Carol Leigh:

Linda, I'm so sorry about your gear being stolen. My heart just sank
when I read your post. You experienced something we all dread. I
remember sobbing when my house was burglarized and my camera gear
taken -- the only stuff in the house I really cared about. Another of
my students parked in front of the Strybing Arboretum in San
Francisco. She chose the gear she wanted to take in and left the rest
in her van. Someone apparently was watching. She lost not one but TWO
tilt-shift lenses, a couple camera bodies, various other lenses, etc.

The only things we can do is keep our equipment to a minimum, don't
leave it in the car, and double-check our homeowners insurance. Easy
to say. I get impatient with Chris, who INSISTS that before we arrive
at our destination we stop somewhere else first and gather together
what we think we'll need. Then when we arrive at the photo
destination, we simply exit the car and head up the path with no
hesitation. I'm going to be more patient with his OUTRAGEOUS REQUESTS
from now on. ;-)

It's just stuff. Now you'll get newer and better stuff! But I do feel
sorry for you. We all do. We've all been there. We all have the same
fears and trepidations. And our collective heart goes out to you.

Carol Leigh

Car break-in.

The following letter to my photography teacher will explain "Car break-in".

Congrats Carol! How exciting to have been acknowledged for your California Wildflower Hotsheet website, and to have been acknowledged in the WSJ. I love it when people who are anonymously always of service get recognized at a larger group level. You deserve the recognition. I feel so lucky to have you as my teacher.

Yesterday I was out on a 4 hour training hike along the Pacific Crest Trail. My husband was kind enough to follow me while I parked my car at the Whitewater Trout Farm. He then drove and dropped me back at the I-10 Freeway where the PCT passes under the freeway before heading north and then west up into the San Bernadino mountains. From my first step on the trail I was blown away by the color display in the normally dry, brown mountains. Splotches of gold and purple continually caught my eye higher up on the hillsides every direction I looked.

The wildflowers were a bloom like I’ve never seen before. The over grown trail was sometimes scary but exciting to walk on (hidden rattlesnakes). Everything looked different because of the atypical abundance of color. Normally dry and brown hills and mountains were blanketed in green. Blooming mustard grew well into the trail. Yellow, deep pink, purple, low, high, big, small….wildflowers were everywhere. When I got higher up on the trail I was presented a Mary Poppins-like view of hills covered in POPPIES!!! As I rounded trail bends, the brilliantly blue sky complemented the orange poppies beautifully. I couldn’t believe I was out hiking and not out photographing with all my camera equipment. I did however snap off many photos as I hiked with the little Sony I always have on me.

I got back to my car only to find that two back windows had been smashed in. Glass was everywhere. My heart sank. I had said to my husband before we left home, “I really should take all my camera equipment out of my car. Nah, it’s safe there!” I hadn’t followed my intuition, and ALL, I mean, ALL my 4 lens, filters, shutter cable release, cleaning equipment and camera were gone. The thieves left the cheapo tripod. My home owner’s insurance deductible is $2000! Oh well, that’s half the expense.

I am sick. These next two weeks were going to be spent photographing wildflowers.

But….

At least I had finished my assignments!!!

I called Carol Davis for consolation. None of my other friends would have understood the loss I am feeling. Thank you Carol Davis.

Linda Jeffers

A big thanks to my hubby for coming back to stay with me for the 2 hours until the police arrived.

Dreary day, dreary mood.

What I see in this photo: a golfer who hasn't transferred his weight in the follow through, a golfer who hasn't finished his turn. A cold golfer wearing more clothes than I normally see golfers wearing, a dreary day coming to an end, birds flying off to prepare for the evening doing whatever they do, dried out fairway grass and street lights on. It's 5pm.

It's not often you can't see the Mt. San Jacinto range. We rarely have bad weather here in the desert. We're spoiled. It seems the weather has affected my mood. Well, maybe I'm just seeing it that the weather is the cause of my mood. This cold is still hanging on. Ray and I walk around/sit around not saying much to each other. We stare. We eat. We sleep. I try to get ready for the upcoming Turks and Caicos trip. Any effort makes me break out in a sweat. How long has it been since I exercised? I'm nearing the 3 week point of not working out- they say after 3 weeks of not exercising you have lost much of your conditioning, the little conditioning I had before.

I showered around 10am thinking a shower would get me ready for the day. Ray and I went out to look for some sandal type shoes for me, pick up cash, buy lunch at Bouche's followed by a stop to buy some things at Trader Joe's: the Jeffers' staple - Lite Popcorn, the best you've ever

had and this Lemon, Ginger, Echinacea drink. Poor Ray is not only sick from his cold, but he has a toothache and can't eat food. Now THIS is a problem.

At home, while reading the new underwater camera manual, I thought! -thinking is always a problem- some popcorn following lunch would be a good idea. Before the popcorn I'd been discouraged trying to figure out what clothes to take on the trip and having no luck in making decisions. After the popcorn I was convinced going to a tropical island where I'd have to be seen in a bathing suit was a ridiculous idea. I think, as I've been told countless times, I should stop thinking.

I feel behind the eight ball. (Here I go again, thinking!) What I mean is because I've been sick and not in my normal schedule, I have not been on top of what I need to get done in the day. I haven't written Susan's belated birthday card (I was waiting until I was in a better mood), I haven't called Dodi since I heard her husband died, I haven't gotten the window pane leaks repaired and we have rain, I know I have tons more to do on "that to do list" of mine that I haven't been willing to look at.

There are only a few days left before we drive to LA Thursday. We won't be driving back to the desert Thursday night as we usually do. Since our flight leaves Saturday at 6am we are staying over in LA. Cindy is coming in Sunday night. She is organizing my files Monday and Tuesday. Wednesday is already a full day. Thursday we leave around noon. Maybe I'll go have some more popcorn and zone out and think about all this tomorrow.

22 year Anniversary of my Mom's death.

12/31/07

Twenty two years ago my Mom passed away. How can that be? Twenty two years have passed and I still remember her as if no time has passed. So many thoughts, memories and feelings come up as I take this time today to post Mom’s photo in honor of the anniversary of her passing.

I’m so different than I was the first 41 years she knew me. I was always a problem for Mom. I wasn’t an easy child. Toxic insecurity and over sensitivity manifested rage; frustrating and confusing my parents. How I wish she could have known this Linda today rather than the Linda I used to be. If only I could have seen how much I must have hurt her with my punishing silence and withdrawal.

Later when I was about 39 or 40 I remember we tried to spend a bit of time together. I was so uncomfortable. I didn’t know how to be or what to do the few times we planned dates to be together. Truthfully, I didn’t know how to be with anyone, not even myself.

Years later as part of living amends to my Mom and Dad, on Sunday, October 08, 1995, my sponsor asked me to list what I admired about my Mom and Dad.

Here is that list:

DAD

Incredible businessman
Great desire to be responsible parent financially and wanting us to thrive for the best.
Loving parent
Generous parent
Bright – witty – interesting
Good looking
Direct
Responsible with making us be responsible kids
Loved his work/life
Informed re: world happenings
Fun
Loved travel
Gentleman

MOM - (After I wrote this list for Mom 12 years ago I was surprised. You see my Dad had always been my hero. My Mom was just, well, just my Mom. I had not fully seen my Mom’s incredible qualities until I put a pen to paper for this assignment.
Also right now I am surprised looking at this list again today noticing how many similar traits Mom and I share – minus of course being a Linguist, Historian and Knowledgeable about everything! I’d always thought we were so different.)

Beautiful
Intelligent
Artistic
Linguist
Historian
Gardener
Well read
Knowledgeable about everything
Self sufficient in entertaining herself
Loved travel
Kind, patient
Loving parent
Responsible
Gracious
Selfless

Mom, you are in my thoughts always. I know you feel my love, respect and gratitude today. And, I feel your love too.

Very moving 1st and 2nd place International pictures of the year. Get some more kleenex.

Normally I ask people not to forward me any of their favorite email jokes, sayings, etc. My friend Sandi knows that I will get mad if she makes an exception and sends me a forwarded email and clutters my mailbox. So, while on the phone, she mentioned and described the incredible photo of the year she'd been sent. I was really curious. So, I made an exception and asked her to forward the photo. I'm glad I did. Here is the link online where you may view 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th place award winners also.


First Place
Todd Heisler The Rocky Mountain News
When 2nd Lt. James Cathey's body arrived at the Reno Airport, Marines climbed into the cargo hold of the plane and draped the flag over his casket as passengers watched the family gather on the tarmac. During the arrival of another Marine's casket last year at Denver International Airport, Major Steve Beck described the scene as one of the most powerful in the process: "See the people in the windows? They'll sit right there in the plane, watching those Marines. You gotta wonder what's going through their minds, knowing that they're on the plane that brought him home," he said. "They're going to remember being on that plane for the rest of their lives. They're going to remember bringing that Marine home. And they should."


Second Place
Todd Heisler The Rocky Mountain News
The night before the burial of her husband's body, Katherine Cathey refused to leave the casket, asking to sleep next to his body for the last time. The Marines made a bed for her, tucking in the sheets below the flag. Before she fell asleep, she opened her laptop computer and played songs that reminded her of 'Cat,' and one of the Marines asked if she wanted them to continue standing watch as she slept. "I think it would be kind of nice if you kept doing it," she said. "I think that's what he would have wanted."

An off day.

I'm having an off day.

It's 3:59 pm and I'm still in my pjs. I started and stopped about 10 different tasks. I couldn't find any energy. I did what I always do when I can't seem to get started......I sat at my computer all morning. Playing.

Around 1pm Ray finished golf, came home and turned on the TV. I found it difficult to not join him in watching all the horrible news of the many southern CA fires.

Last night I'd called my brother Don to find out if the Malibu fires were close to him. He said the fires were 6 miles away, thank goodness. Today, I called Taye and Angela. They both live near two other fires in the San Fernando Valley. Then Donna and Jeff Saufley had someone post on the PCT L online digest that they were safe. We hikers were worried about them. Donna and Jeff are well known, much loved, PCT trail angels whose home and yard is open to all hikers when they pass through Aqua Dulce along the PCT.

I went out to try a photo lesson that had been suggested I try to determine why I'm not having great results with my macro lens. After uploading the new test photos I was again disappointed. I didn't have any better luck than I'd had the day before photographing the bougainvillea. I'd set the aperture for aperture priority and took 10 or more photos of the same flower, in the same position, at different f-stops. I couldn't tell much difference between the change in f-stops. My back is stressed from the hour of holding the camera yesterday, so I stopped feeling I'd wasted time. But at least I did what I said I was going to do.

I received a phone call from Sherali asking me to pick her up before our meeting tonight so I better go get out of the pjs, shower and get to first pick up Sandi and then Sherali. I am the Grapevine representative at the Monday night meeting. I give a report each week so I better look through the magazine so I'll have something interesting to share during my report.